Autism Spectrum Disorders include Autism, Asperger Syndrome and PDD-NOS, which significantly impact socialization, communication and behavior.
Asperger Syndrome- it's what Trent has.
Oh how... do I write my feelings about this?
It's not something that I am surprised by, it is not something that has changed who he is.
He is still the same boy he was yesterday & the day before.
He is a sweet boy with a good heart. He is kind, mostly- he just has tough time in social situations especially crowds- which isn't easy when you are in a big family.
He doesn't understand social cues. He is hyperactive. He definitely does not get embarrassed.
I guess what hurts the most is that my pediatrician told me last month that kids with Asperger's are typically targets of teasing & generally have a difficult time being accepted by their peers. She is absolutely right.
She suggested we talk to his class at school,
church & scouts & let them know why he is different.
I have contemplated this while waiting
for the official diagnosis & I agree- she's right.
It is really a way to teach the other kids,
why he is different so that as they grow up maybe they will be understanding with him.
If we wait until he is older I think they will just make fun of him anyway.
Right now they are young & accepting. He has the best teachers.
He will get the help he needs, I will make sure of it.
Now I know why I have been prompted so many times to work & volunteer at the school. Everyone knows me & our family. People look out for Trent, they really do.
Yesterday I went in to work in his class & the playground supervisor stopped me and told me how Trent had said something funny on the playground the day before.
He had skinned his knee on the wall- and said, " I think I left my skin on the wall."
He is so funny.
I gave her a hug and thanked her for being so good to him.
Gosh, this hurts.
I love this kid.
8 comments:
I love you Patsy! I cannot imagine how hard this must be for you. I'm glad you finally found out though and at least now you have some keys to help unlock some doors. Trent is a GREAT kid, and everyone does love him, you are right about that. I think talking to his class is a great idea. Trent is lucky to have a big family, everyone looking out for him and loving him is his biggest asset. How right you were to choose "LOVE" as your word of the year! I love you Patsy!
Your right... it does not change who he is or has been to all of us! We love this kid so much! He is awesome, and funny, and loveable!
I love what Wende says about having the keys to unlock doors. Knowledge is power, and armed with this knowledge you can go forward with great strength and power to help him.
I love the idea of going to the class and the scouts etc. and helping to teach them about it too. We had a Mia Maid in our class with Asperger Syndrome and until we learned about what it was and how she was different because of it... we found her harder to deal with, but after learning what it was and what her specific challenges were with it, we were so much more able to protect those environments that we were unknowingly causing to detract from the spirit for her.
Does that make sense, we really didn't change much, but because we were given that knowledge, we were so much more aware what different settings were causing for her, and were able to avoid them easily because of that knowledge.
You are a wonderful Mom and Trent has his best alli in you!
My heart weeps PJ. He was blessed to get you and Brett for parents and he always will be. I wish I knew how to help you to help him. We'll just have to give extra love. pad
Sorry, I knew your word was balance, I was thinking of Jill I guess. Either way, Trent is lucky to have you, you are full of love.
PJ-
Just got your comment and then stopped by and saw this post. There are 5 million things I want to say to you. I have quite a few blog friends that are LDS moms with kids with autism or asperger's- they have been a HUGE suppor to me.
I love all the stuff you wrote down- it does not change how you feel about him. You love him the same- no matter what. I think it helps me understand better why my son does "interesting" things.
I'd LOVE to chat with you and give you some directions to go- books, therapies or ideas and the like. I'm here for you. I will email you later today (sorry CRAZY day). Know that I am thinking of you. :)
I love you Patsy... my thoughts and prayers are with you. I think that going to the schools is a really good idea. I am so glad that I have gotten to live so close to you for the time that I have and that Trent is the part of my life and heart that he is.
Thanks guys! I am at peace with this- remember that this "official diagnosis" was a long time coming. I know he is going to have struggles but I really believe it is going to be okay.
It's great that you finally got a diagnosis so you can work with Trent and educate others. My brother Andrew has Down's Syndrome & Autism and my dad has gone into multiple classes to teach the kids about Andrew's needs and the way Andrew sees the world. It made a huge difference with the kids at church and now after being in their ward for 7 years Andrew is rooted there and not an oddity at all. (Not that it took 7 years, just that it's cool after all these years to see the teenagers who were kids when he got there be so sweet to him.)
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