I am finding myself in this new stage of life, completely stunned.
How did this happen?
How did all my kids - all six of them- grow up so fast?
I remember all the older women at church, or even in the grocery store & neighborhood, telling me to enjoy my kids while they were little... but I could not imagine how right they were.
Being a stay at home mom has been all I've ever wanted to be. Now that stage of my life
is over.
I don't know what to do with myself.
After several years of financial difficulties- Brett being laid off twice- sigh-
I keep thinking I need to pick up a side job, or start teaching cooking lessons again- just start something to make up for what money we've lost. Who am I kidding? I can't make all that up? My head is full of negative- then positive- but mostly negative thoughts.
It's all so big and overwhelming.
What to do?
I'm now 51 1/2.... and I don't know what to be when I grow up! I mean I did- I did it- now what?
I started a Hosting Mission on Temple Square. This month marks my 1 year anniversary. It's a 2 year commitment. It's fun & I love being there.
I meet with a group of friends most Wednesdays for lunch & kind of a group therapy session. It's been my lifeline for the past 10+ years.
I have a volunteer job at church- I work with the young women in our congregation 12-18 year old. I love them & it's great.
But what else is there? What am I supposed to do? I LOVE AND ADORE my grandchildren I could hang out with them all day, but that's not it. They have lives, mothers who are more than capable. Trent needs my care a lot- but that is a whole other post (coming soon for sure.)
So- here I am-
Three years after I told my therapist I would start writing regularly on this blog. Trying to write so that I can figure myself out.
how about you- what do you ---- do?
1 comment:
Thank you for sharing and being real. I feel exactly the same way. I made a choice to stay home with my children because I knew it would be the best thing for them. Not once did I think about what my life would be like now that I have completed that job. We have a lot of good productive years left, but it is hard to start from scratch at this point in our lives.
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