Fall 2014

Fall is really my favorite time of year.

I just have to go back & post a little about last year... before...

it comes again!

During October we made cookies-

and watched the Great Pumpkin Charlie Brown.

Hailey turned 21- she loves all things chicken- and got this funny chicken plate.
Isn't she just the cutest!?

and Charlie turned 5.

He wanted pirate dress up clothes for his birthday.

look at this cute little pirate!

I can't resist posting this picture of Peter.

He is such a sweet baby. 

Lucky me- I made it to Charlie's Preschool Halloween Parade.

LOVED IT

AND- Trent is big enough now to carve his own pumpkins- so fun.

On Halloween night a cowboy Johnny & chocolate covered 50's style Claire dropped in.

The Swat Team took care of a little pumpkin & went trick or treating in their own neighborhood.

Buzz & Woody had the best time- but by the time I took this photo- they were done.

I am still teaching cooking classes for kids at home & at work downtown.

we had a little Halloween lunch party.

As much as I hate summer to come to an end- 

Fall 2015 is just around the corner.

a birthday post-

Last week was my 47th birthday!

I hate to be all downer about it....

but I am kind of a big fat baby when it comes to my birthday.

I anticipate it for at least a week, usually longer.

 I get all weepy & start feeling sorry for myself. 

Next- I wonder why I am alive in the first place & if anyone loves me or ever has?

I imagine the worst possible thing happening... nobody remembering me.

 I contemplate it for days & wonder if I should go away on a trip so I won't be so disappointed and

 regret all of my life choices thus far.... 

I really do all of this.

every. year.

I feel so bad for my sweet husband.

 He has to live through this year- after year- after year.

It's ridiculous- I'm not proud- It's ugly- I'm starting therapy next month

(just keepin' it real.)

Maybe by now you have guessed that I have had a few rough birthdays?

WELL NOt This YEAR BabY!

Balloons on my mailbox- who did that?

 I want to kiss your face.

 I cried.

My mom called me first thing in the morning & let me pick out two books on Amazon that she sent out that day. I love them- they are here. Thanks mom. I love that you did that.

Karen & I went to lunch- I picked this place & it was wonderful & I love Karen.

 Thank you so much!

I came home to a present in the mail!

 Jill- you amaze me with your thoughtfulness & creativity!

Thank you!

Lisa left this on my doorstep & she didn't even have to do that?!

The "blogger moms" are having a real birthday party for me this week-

 lots of them were out of town last week.

Then- I was so lucky to get to meet up with ALL OF THESE CUTIES for a dinner I didn't even make!

I LOVED MY BIRTHDAY THIS YEAR

Pre-dinner show of cuteness brought to you by:

Joey & Finn above- Charlie & Crew below

Peter was just plain cute. period.

We ate at probably my favorite place to eat downtown.

Did I mention it was such a great day?

 I even had help blowing out the candle on my dessert!

After dinner the kids & Brett were so great to give me all of these thoughtful gifts.

Tears, more tears-- such very thoughtful gifts- really.

The kids made a list of 47 things they love about mom...

 I read it out loud. 

Brett made me a list of the: Top Ten Reasons He is Glad He Married me

The kids read them out loud.

And I needed it.

I really did.

It's been a hard year of doubt, worry, weight gain, wondering if it is all my fault, asking myself over & over & over if I was good enough? If any of my life was good enough? 

I don't write this for you to feel sad for me or even to prove that I'm a brat

 - because really my life is awesome-

 or for people to leave comments.

I just want anyone out there who is reading (especially my future self & children) that

 sometimes life is just hard like that.

 And- sometimes it stays hard for a good long while,

 so you press on, and on, then wonder if it's worth it? 

And the answer is:

YES

It is worth it

I am worth it and so are YOU.

in june

In June

We got a zoo pass~

We went twice in one week-

I went with Laura to the mall with the twins

these two are so much fun...and really busy.

(crew on the left- finn on the right)
Joey had a birthday!

Joey

Johnny

Lola

Charlie

Finn

Crew

Clair

Tony made these really awesome cars & Megan made this amazing cake.

(Can you tell Joey was just a little excited to be three?)

Brian & Jack took the twins & Trent fishing- brave or stupid?

Chloe made a drastic change & got a pixie cut!

She donated 15 inches to Locks of Love

She LOVES it & so do we!

June has been a good month~